Top 7 Wi-Fi Passwords That Don’t Work at Caffe Ladro

By Michael Draper
If you read the internet, you know about listicles, but this one is better than the rest so get hyped. Every week we count down the top 7 in various categories about the great city of Seattle. This week we explore the…

Top 7 Wi-Fi Passwords That Don’t Work at Caffe Ladro

Seattle is known as a place for coffee, and there’s no better place to relax with a laptop for work or pleasure than a coffee shop. Each shop has a unique wi-fi password that says a lot about its values. Here’s the top 7 wi-fi passwords we’re glad do not work at the Caffe Ladro in Fremont:

7. LadroFremont

Let’s be real, this one just isn’t very creative. A wi-fi password is your chance to show the world what you think an important string of letters and/or numbers would be. Be the change you want to see in the world.

Aerial 4
Creativity in a Coffee Shop is just plain better.

6. PatriarchyRulez

Thank goodness this password does not grant us access to the vast expanses of the worldwide web! Even if Ladro was trying to be ironic with this one, this is still a major ‘no.’ Replacing ‘s’ with ‘z’ is usually pretty awesome, but not while women still make 79 cents to every dollar a man makes.

5. DumbledoreKillzSnape

Can you imagine if this worked? This would not only spoil a beloved literature series, but we are not completely sure it is accurate. Bonus points for the z replacement, though. We can see where they weren’t going with that.

4. ThisCoffeeIsOverpriced

No one complains about spending $4 for a coffee anymore, so why even bring this up? Thank you, Ladro, for not reminding us about the relative price of our favorite drink.

3. BlackCoffeeMatters

This lady didn't know the password either. Her name was Sheila. Or Shyra? Can't remember. She doens't know we took a photo.
This lady didn’t know the password either. Her name was Sheila. Or Shyra? Can’t remember. She doesn’t know we took a photo.

Holy shit, we nearly lost it as our laptop attempted to connect to the vast expanses of human knowledge using this password as its entry ticket. Thankfully it did not work. We believe that Black Lives Matter, and are happy to report that we cannot rule out that the proprietors of Caffe Ladro agree.

2. AdamAndTeaNOTAdamAndSteve

Just because marriage equality is the law of the land does not mean everyone is on board with it. While we’re disappointed this password would not grant us access to that sweet, sweet wireless fidelity internet, it would show a lack of human compassion on the part of this lovely establishment so that’s good.

1.YouReallyShouldPostThePasswordOnTheWall,WeDon’tWantToInteractWithTheBaristaAgain

Does punctuation even work in a WEP key?
Well, we are happy to report that these 7 passwords showed no signs of working at Caffe Ladro in Fremont. We’ll stop at a Starbucks with unprotected wi-fi on the way home to post this.

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